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I had called upon my friend Sherlock Holmes upon the second morning after Christmas, with the intention of wishing him the compliments of the season. He was lounging upon the sofa in a purple dressing-gown, a pipe-rack within his reach upon the right, and a pile of crumpled morning papers, evidently newly studied, near at hand. Beside the couch was a wooden chair, and on the angle of the back hung a very seedy and disreputable hard-felt hat, much the worse for wear, and cracked in several places. A lens and a forceps lying upon the seat of the chair suggested that the hat had been suspended in this manner for the purpose of examination.
“You are engaged,” said I; “perhaps I interrupt you.”
“Not at all. I am glad to have a friend with whom I can discuss my results. The matter is a perfectly trivial one” — he jerked his thumb in the direction of the old hat –”but there are points in connection with it which are not entirely devoid of interest and even of instruction.”
I seated myself in his armchair and warmed my hands before his crackling fire, for a sharp frost had set in, and the windows were thick with the ice crystals. “I suppose,” I remarked, “that, homely as it looks, this thing has some deadly story linked on to it — that it is the clew which will guide you in the solution of some mystery and the punishment of some crime.”
“No, no. No crime,” said Sherlock Holmes, laughing. “Only one of those whimsical little incidents which will happen when you have four million human beings all jostling each other within the space of a few square miles. Amid the action and reaction of so dense a swarm of humanity, every possible combination of events may be expected to take place, and many a little problem will be presented which may be striking and bizarre without being criminal. We have already had experience of such.”
“So much so,” I remarked, “that of the last six cases which I have added to my notes, three have been entirely free of any legal crime.”
“Precisely. You allude to my attempt to recover the Irene Adler papers, to the singular case of Miss Mary Sutherland, and to the adventure of the man with the twisted lip. Well, I have no doubt that this small matter will fall into the same innocent category. You know Peterson, the commissionaire?”

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The fallout from Adam Lambert’s risqué American Music Awards performance keeps coming with “Good Morning America” canceling the singer’s live performance scheduled for Wednesday morning.
ABC was flooded with more than 1,500 complaints, and the network sent an e-mail to potential concert goers letting them know that Lambert would not be performing on Wednesday.
“Given Adam Lambert’s controversial live performance on the AMAs, we were concerned about airing a similar concert so early in the morning,” a spokesperson for the network said.
“The Early Show” on rival network CBS was quick to announce that they have booked Lambert to perform and discuss the controversy on Wednesday morning.
Lambert shocked viewers with his sexually suggestive dance sequence that included simulated oral sex as well as Lambert kissing his male keyboardist.

The death toll in a Philippine massacre rose to 52 on Wednesday as police found six more bodies, state-run media reported.
Authorities found the bodies in a makeshift grave at the massacre site in the country’s south, the Philippine News Agency reported. It was not immediately clear whether the six bodies were found in the same grave where dozens of other bodies were discovered Tuesday.
President Gloria Macapagal-Arroyo declared Wednesday a national day of mourning as authorities tried to round up suspects in Monday’s massacre, the news agency reported. Arroyo also expressed the government’s sympathies to the victims’ families.
The agency called the killings in Maguindanao province the worst politically motivated violence in recent Philippine history.
Those slain included relatives of Ismael “Toto” Mangudadatu, who had sent the women to file paperwork allowing him to run for governor of Maguindanao in May.
Mangudadatu said he had received threats — which he thought were from allies of Governor Andal Ampatuan — that he would be kidnapped if he filed the candidate papers himself. Instead, his wife, his sister and journalists accompanying them were kidnapped and killed.
The victims included at least 12 journalists, according to the press freedom organization Reporters Without Borders, making Monday the deadliest single day for journalists anywhere in the world.

Military brass at Fort Hood, Texas, on Tuesday announced tightened security procedures and the availability of a range of mental health services in the wake of the November 5 shooting spree that killed 13 people on the post.
Steps have been taken to tighten restrictions on who gets onto the post, to position armed guards in key locations including behavioral health facilities, and to carry out random inspections of containers, said Col. Bill Hill, garrison commander.
“Relaxed entry will cease,” he told post personnel in a televised town hall meeting.
All vehicles entering the post will be required to display a Department of Defense sticker or a secure pass, and some buildings will require badge access, he said.
Security at both the fort’s airfields also will be tightened, with guards and patrols on site, he said.
Soldiers assigned to Fort Hood will have to register their personal firearms with the director of emergency services, he added. Fort Hood is home to some 50,000 active-duty soldiers and 18,000 of the soldiers’ family members.
The suspect in the shootings, Army psychiatrist Maj. Nidal Malik Hasan, 39, has been charged with 13 counts of premeditated murder. Hasan, who was wounded by two civilian officers, is being treated at a hospital.
Additional charges are under consideration, Col. Jeff Harris said.
Many of the security changes have already been implemented, including additional searches at the gates and greater restrictions on who can get onto the post, said Lt. Gen. Bob Cone, Fort Hood’s commanding general.
But, Cone said, had the changes been in place on November 5, they might not have been enough.
“I don’t think necessarily they would have had an effect on this event,” he said.
Among Fort Hood’s resources for treating mental health problems — including post-traumatic stress disorder — are a 12-bed inpatient psychiatric ward, an outpatient clinic, a combat stress reset program, social services and substance abuse treatment, said Dr. Steve Braverman, commander of Fort Hood’s Carl R. Darnall Army Medical Center.

“My dear fellow,” said Sherlock Holmes, as we sat on either side of the fire in his lodgings at Baker Street, “life is infinitely stranger than anything which the mind of man can invent. We would not dare to conceive the things which are really mere commonplaces of existence. If we could fly out of that window hand in hand, hover over this great city, gently remove the roofs, and peep in at the queer things which are going on, the strange coincidences, the plannings, the cross-purposes, the wonderful chains of events, working through generations, and leading to the most outre results, it would make all fiction, with its conventionalities and foreseen conclusions, most stale and unprofitable.”
“And yet I am not convinced of it,” I answered. “The cases which come to light in the papers are, as a rule, bald enough, and vulgar enough. We have in our police reports realism pushed to its extreme limits, and yet the result is, it must be confessed, neither fascinating nor artistic.”
“A certain selection and discretion must be used in producing a realistic effect,” remarked Holmes. “This is wanting in the police report, where more stress is laid perhaps upon the platitudes of the magistrate than upon the details, which to an observer contain the vital essence of the whole matter. Depend upon it, there is nothing so unnatural as the commonplace.”
I smiled and shook my head. “I can quite understand your thinking so,” I said. “Of course, in your position of unofficial adviser and helper to everybody who is absolutely puzzled, throughout three continents, you are brought in contact with all that is strange and bizarre. But here,” – I picked up the morning paper from the ground – “let us put it to a practical test. Here is the first heading upon which I come. ‘A husband’s cruelty to his wife.’ There is half a column of print, but I know without reading it that it is all perfectly familiar to me. There is, of course, the other woman, the drink, the push, the blow, the bruise, the unsympathetic sister or landlady. The crudest of writers could invent nothing more crude.”
“Indeed your example is an unfortunate one for your argument,” said Holmes, taking the paper, and glancing his eye down it. “This is the Dundas separation case, and, as it happens, I was engaged in clearing up some small points in connection with it. The husband was a teetotaler, there was no other woman, and the conduct complained of was that he had drifted into the habit of winding up every meal by taking out his false teeth and hurling them at his wife, which you will allow is not an action likely to occur to the imagination of the average story teller. Take a pinch of snuff, doctor, and acknowledge that I have scored over you in your example.”

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